Random IZ Stories!
by Manic Mundane
Summary: Random IZ stories. Could be anything. Completely random. The first chapter was by me, you can leave suggestions for the next story in reviews. Rated "M", for a reason. In the 2nd story, Dib and Gaz get home from the first day of Hi Skool and Tak drops by.
1. Story 1: A Slave of My Own

Exogorth presents  
Random IZ Stories

My mind can lead us all anywhere. So how about the randomocity that my mind can also create? The following story is a big collection of little stories. I'm open to suggestions. If you get absolutely any suggestions, then contact me. You can also submit suggestions in your reviews. And, if you're lucky, they'll wind up here. So sit back, relax and enjoy Random IZ Stories. Alright then, lets begin.

* * *

Story #1: A Slave of My Own.  
Crafted with "Luv" by Exogorth

* * *

Zim was working on his latest invention.

"It...is done!" he shouted triumphantly "With this, I will be able to control any one of those hideous humans. And who better to first try it on than the Dib?"

"I dunno, but let's make him go a 'splodey!" said GIR.

"No, GIR, no. I will control his mind and he will become my eternal slave. And there we be no one left to stop me from destroying all life on this pathetic planet!" Zim started to laugh maniacally and was soon joined in by GIR. Zim stopped laughing and stared at GIR, who couldn't stop laughing, for a few seconds and then said "Stop, GIR." and GIR did as he was told.

* * *

Dib lay on his bed in his room. Silent. Completely silent. He was in deep thought.

Should he give up? Should he stop believing? Should he become "Normal"?

He didn't know what to do.

'_Is it worth it?_' he thought to himself '_No._'

He knew he couldn't give up hope. So what if people thought he was crazy. He'd prove them wrong. He'd prove them all wrong. He'd show them. He'd show them all.

He had recently come up with a new plan to infiltrate Zim's base and get photographic evidence of Zim without his disguise on. Then maybe, just maybe, people would believe.

They'd have to. Those red eyes. The antennae. People would see that he wasn't human. Then Dib would be worshiped as the hero he really was.

So he decided to leave.

Zim ran as fast as he could to Dib's house. Right when he reached the front door he heard Dib coming.

'_I must hurry. The Dib will be outside in just a few seconds._' Zim thought to himself.

Zim panicked, he attached a little machine to the doorknob that would send sonic waves to the invention down in his lab and would activate it, making Dib his eternal slave as soon as he even touches the doorknob to leave.

'_There. Now lets see him try to stop me._'

Just when he was inches from the door, he heard Zim snickering.

'_He's outside. But why? What the hell's he up to?_' he thought '_Is it some new dumb invention of his? What's going on? I have to find out._'

He decided he'd check it out once he was outside. He reached for the doorknob. And, upon contact, he received a static shock.

"Ow! Son of a..." before he could even finish his sentence, he was under Zim's control.

He stood up completely straight, the only moving he did was the movement in his chest from breathing. It was almost like he was a robot now. He had a blank, emotionless expression on his face.

"Come outside." Zim gave his new slave his first task.

Dib opened the door, walked outside and closed the door behind him.

"Yes! It worked!" Zim exclaimed. "Come. We must return to the base. You have much to do."

"Yes, lord Zim. I obey." said Dib in a monotonous, robotic voice.

Zim led the way and Dib followed close behind.

* * *

They took the elevator down to the lab and were greeted by GIR shortly after.

"Hi!" said the little optimistic trash can.

"Finally, a slave of my very own." said Zim. He looked at GIR for a few seconds.

GIR stared blankly back at him and then waved with a huge smile on his face "Hello!" Zim unenthusiastically waved back at the little robot. Then he looked back at Dib, at whom he had been staring at earlier. Staring and planning. Planning on what to do next. Then he continued talking to himself. "A functioning slave anyway."

Though Zim was unaware of this, something had gone wrong.

Dib's body was under Zim's control. Dib still had conscious thought. He had free thinking, he just couldn't control his body. Including to speak out loud what he was thinking. The only words that came out were words of pure obedience. That, and anything Zim told him to say.

'_I swear to god, Zim, as soon as I'm back in control I'm going to kick your ass!_' Dib thought.

Zim could not come up with anything for his new slave to do.

"You could make 'im go outside and act all funny 'n stuff. I'd like it, cuz it'd be funny. Make 'im say he gotta big head." GIR suggested.

"No, GIR, that idea is stupid." Zim said without even listening to what GIR was saying. He saw GIR's mouth move but all heard was "Blah, blah, blah."

"MAKE 'IM BE FUNNY! MAKE 'IM BE FUNNY!" GIR started throwing another temper tantrum.

"No!"

Then Zim thought of something. "If I could make him go outside in the public, I could make him embarrass himself. When he'd snap out of this, he'd be ridiculed beyond belief. He'd never even be able to leave his dwelling. Thus leaving no one to stop me." Which was exactly what GIR just suggested, once more demonstrating Zim's penchant for not paying attention.

'_Come on. Please. If I can't snap out of this, my life is going to be horrible...even more so._' Dib was trying as hard as he could to regain control of his body, to no avail.

Zim had just made a stupid outfit and forced Dib to wear it and the slave-boy was already heading outside, ready to ruin Dib's social life...if it could get any worse than it was already, anyway.

Dib was outside in that stupid outfit, if he was lucky no one would see him.

But people saw. However, Dib couldn't the sound of the door locking behind him. And he realized that if he tried hard enough and snapped his body out of the stupid trance it was in, he could run inside.

People laughed at the sight of him in the stupid outfit, but it seemed that no one recognized him. So no one would be able to say they saw him in a stupid outfit and embarrass him...as long as Zim didn't ruin anything.

'_Come on, snap out of it. I've got to get inside before anybody recognizes me._'

He managed to gain control of his right arm. He stretched his arm back, hoping to find the doorknob.

He almost touched the doorknob, but stretched too far back and fell.

But he managed to drag himself to the doorstep with the one arm he could control and reached for the doorknob.

People were still laughing, especially when he fell. A huge crowd was drawn in, all laughing in ridicule.

Dib managed to turn the doorknob and dragged himself inside. Not able to close the door, he kept dragging himself further. And he finally made it to the kitchen, but he couldn't go further. The strain was too much.

Then GIR walked by, humming a tune to himself. "You needs hellllllllp?" the little robot said with curiosity.

Dib managed to make his free hand give an "Okay" sign, even though it ached beyond belief.

"OOOOOOOKAAAAY!" GIR screamed and helped Dib up, then closed the door.

'_Hmmm, I guess his robot isn't useless after all. Not evil. Not good, either. Somewhere in between. He's just being bossed around by Zim to do bad things. He's stupid, though. Malfunctioning, too. But he just might be the key to get me out of this and get my life back to normal._'

Then GIR kindly lead Dib down to the lab.

Dib looked strained enough. His face was flushed. Maybe he could use this to make it look like he was embarrassed. And maybe Zim would fall for it.

"Back so soon?" asked Dib's Irken slavedriver.

"He done had enoughs for nows." GIR explained, thankfully not mentioning the fact that Dib wasn't embarrassed at all.

Zim walked by and Dib mustered up all of the strength he had into his left arm and gave Zim a slug to the face, knocking him over.

'_Come on, body, snap out of it. You've got a chance, now take it._'

And he snapped about halfway out of it. He could control his body now, but he was still prone to following orders. And if Zim discovered this, Dib's one chance would be ruined.

Dib couldn't let that happen, so he ran for his life. But then it hit him "Damn it! This dumb clown costume is still on me."

He ran to the elevator and pressed the 'up' button. He had to quick, though. He'd only have a few seconds before he'd reach the upper part of Zim's base.

He ripped the stupid clown costume off, underneath his jacket and shirt were removed so he could fit into the bodysuit better. But his pants were left on.

'_Thank god Zim decided to leave my pants on when he put me into this._' he thought.

The elevator reached the top and the door opened, so Dib quickly walked out.

He saw the door, his ticket to freedom.

He ran for the door, only for GIR to burst through the floor with Zim on his back.

"You're not going anywhere, stupid Dib-human!" Zim yelled.

And that one command brought Dib back into his trance. "Yes, lord Zim. I obey."

"That's better. Now, back to the lab."

"I obey."

GIR flew back down the hole, Zim still on his back.

There was a large hole in the floor, so the once again slave-Dib jumped through and followed.

'_Damn it! I was so close!_'

And now, no matter how hard Dib tried, he couldn't bring control back to his body. It was like his mind was forced to carry around a bunch of dead weight.

Dead weight that followed orders.

* * *

Fin?

* * *

Well, there you have it. The first story. Whether you like it or not, you're going to have to review for another one. Who knows? Maybe there'll be a continuation of this. So, even though I don't encourage reviews (because I don't want to tell you how to live your life), now I'm asking you to. Review, review, review! With all due respect, Exogorth.


	2. Story 2: She's a Teenage Heart Throb

To Zim'sMostLoyalServant: To be honest, the first story was just a scrapped version of "Possessed". Absolutely no edits were made to it whatsoever. So, in answer to your question, the reason everyone laughed at Dib even though they didn't know it was him is because he looked so stupid that it wouldn't make sense not to laugh. About your request, you did mean what I think you mean. Right?

Anyway, on with the story. It's a lemon. The first lemon I've ever done (so far...on this site...that you know of). And it's *looks at index card and squints really hard* GATR. I've never done GATR before, but I'll give it my best shot. Also, it sounds like "Aligator". Ah-hem, here's an AliGATR by Exogorth. Heh. So, here goes nothing. P.S. Forgive me for this, as I regret nothing! P.S.S. New separating lines *giggles (rather unconvincingly) like a school girl*. P.S.S.S. There's a "Drawn Together" reference hidden somewheres in here, a cyber-cookie to anyone who can find it!

XxxxxxX

Story 2: (She's a) Teenage Heart-throb.  
Painstakingly drawn before a live audience by Exogorth.

XxxxxxX

The last bell of the day rang and all the students were dismissed.

Dib and his sister Gaz walked home.

As soon as they walked through the door they were greeted by their father, Professor Membrane.

"Hello, children. How was your first day of Hi Skool?"

"Horrible. I got my ass kicked repeatedly." Dib replied. He had a black eye and numerous visible bruises, along with scratch marks.

"I'm going up to my room. No disturbances. Believe me, you'll live longer." Gaz replied darkly and stormed up to her room.

"What was her problem?" Dib asked.

"Ah, you know hormones." replied the Professor. "Listen, I have to go out for a while. Big science meeting, you know."

"How long will you been gone?"

"I'll be back sometime later tonight. Should be no later than midnight."

"Midnight? Will I even survive until then?"

"Of course you will." '_My poor, insane son._' Membrane thought to himself. "Well, um, I better be going. Bye now. And behave yourself."

"Yes, dad." Dib groaned. Then the Professor locked and closed the door. Now Dib was all alone...with his sister. '_I'd better not piss her off, or else..._' Dib shuddered at the thought. Then rushed up into his room to do his homework.

XxxxxX

Gaz sat in her room, angry at the fact that she had homework right now. As if she'd do it, but still.

"That Mrs. Eudolph is such a bitch, I mean homework on the first day. What the fuck is wrong with her?"

XxxxxX

"There!" Dib said. "All done...Now what?"

Then there was a huge crash outside.

**BOOM!**

"What the hell was that?"

XxxxxX

Dib quickly rushed outside to find a smoldering scrap heap of a ship in the back yard.

"Another spaceship? The grass hasn't even fully grown back from when Tak's ship crashed all those years ago!"

"Ow! Irk damn it!" a familiar voice yelled from the ship.

"Tak?" Dib called, afraid someone would recognize him (even if it _was_ Tak).

"Dib?" the voice called back.

Tak climbed out of the wreckage. She didn't look too different. In fact the only real difference in her appearance was the fact that she was taller. Around 5' 4'', the same height as Gaz.

"Tak! What are you doing back on Earth?"

"What do mean, stupid human?"

"We all thought you were dead."

"Pfft. Me, the almighty Tak? Dead?" she laughed rudely. "Oh, that's a good one."

Dib gave her an angry stare.

"Oh, you were serious."

"Yes. Now allow me to ask again, what are you doing here?"

"Silly little monkey-boy, I've come to destroy all human-kind."

"HEY!" Gaz's voice screamed from the back door. "I said no disturbances and-Wait, what is _she_ doing here?"

"I'm here to destroy all humans, purple demon human." Tak replied.

"Well, finally."

"Wait, you don't have a problem with this?"

"No. Why would I?"

"Well, I would just assume that no one would actually _want_ me to."

"Well, you were wrong."

"Oh, then my plan is ruined. I give up."

"Yay!" Dib cried with joy. "The Earth is saved!"

"Shut up!" the two females shouted in unison.

"Fine. If anyone needs me, I'll be in my room." Dib said sadly.

"Doing what?" Tak asked him, not really wanting to know (but she felt she had to anyway).

"What do you think?"

The door slammed and Dib went up to his room, locked the door and drew the blinds.

"Eww..." Tak muttered to herself. "Anyway, my ship is totaled. I require I a place to stay! Can I crash here?"

"Yeah sure, whatever."

"Okay then. Quickly, purple-haired girl, lead me inside!"

"Alright, alright. Keep your fucking clothes on!"

She opened the door and led Tak inside.

"Ooh, nice place." Tak said, observing the house.

"I guess you can sleep on the couch or something. Oh, and don't touch my sodas. Word to the wise."

Tak gave a single nod showing she understood. "That's okay, I do not require sustenance. Or sleep."

"That's good. Still, keeps your filthy mitts off my sodas."

"Okay, yeesh!"

"Hey, don't get smart with me."

Tak gave Gaz a shove, making her stumble backwards and fall (aww shit).

"Ow, damn it!"

"Weakling!"

"Oh, that's it. You're dead, bitch!"

Gaz got back up and walked straight towards Tak. They were inches away from each other, each giving the other a harsh stare. Then the cold looks on their faces grew warm and they stared longingly into each others eyes.

Uh oh, I know where this is going. If this isn't for you, please turn back now. I won't be offended.

Then they both did something neither of them expected of themselves, they kissed. And they liked it (I am _so_ twisted). They stopped for a split second, Tak giving Gaz a look as if saying "Is it okay?"

"It's okay, my dad's not home." Gaz whispered to her.

Tak nodded and smiled and they resumed their kiss.

They fell onto couch, still making out. Moaning into each other's mouths, they grew more and more aroused with each passing second.

Gaz shuddered in delight when she felt their tongues touch. She had always wondered what an Irken's tongue felt like. And now she knew. It was rough, yet still smooth and delicate. But no matter how it felt, it was still a great feeling whenever their tongues touched.

They stopped only to catch their breath, but they both looked to the stairs and saw Dib.

He was just standing there, mouth agape (and an erection, too). His eyes showed a mixed expression of shock, fear, concern and arousal. He had heard the loud thud from Tak pushing Gaz and came down to see what all the commotion was.

They all said nothing for a few seconds and then Gaz finally broke the silence. "Get lost, Dib! This is none of your business!"

He couldn't think of anything to say.

"Now, Dib!"

"..."

"LEAVE!"

He ran upstairs into his room and locked the door behind in case Gaz had given chase, but she didn't. She continued her passionate make out session with Tak.

They continued for a few more seconds before Tak finally broke away.

She looked like she was about to say something, but couldn't get any words out. Instead, she silently worked on removing her own clothing.

Gaz simply watched, curious to see what a naked Irken looked like.

She watched with much anticipation as Tak removed her gloves and shirt. But she had to let Tak get up so that she could fully undress. And she did.

Tak could get up now. So she got up and started to remove more clothing. Slowly. Piece by piece.

Gaz couldn't take it, however, being brash and impatient. She got a little on edge. "Hurry up." she commanded.

Tak gave a nod and quickly undressed completely.

Gaz got very excited upon seeing the naked female Irken.

Tak was indeed a true female. Her breasts were small, but Gaz didn't care. She like, no loved, Tak the way she was already.

Then she spoke for the first time since right before they shared their first kiss together. "Your turn."

Gaz grew nervous, but Tak came over and gave her a comforting hug. "It's okay." she said softly and she kissed her on the cheek.

Gaz gave her a nod and stood up. Tak sat on the couch and watched while Gaz undressed.

Tak, in turn, was excited and curious. Gaz's body wasn't very different from her own. Just the fact that her body was curvier.

And when she was finished, she got on the couch and laid back as Tak got closer and closer until she was on top of the purple-haired girl.

And then Tak began to rub her lower body up against Gaz's. Slowly at first. Then gradually building speed, much to the pleasure of the both of them.

Tak kissed her lover and moved down, gently nipping and sucking on her neck. Giving her a love-bite.

Tak then pulled her head back, leaving a line of saliva. Then she ran her long tongue across her zipper-like teeth and then across her "lips".

They continued scissoring at an even faster pace now, picking up more and more speed with every few seconds. It was pushing them to their limits and bringing them oh so very close.

Until, once again, Dib interupted. "Jesus Christ!"

They both stopped suddenly.

"Not again with this, Dib." Gaz, in her normal angry tone.

"Leave, Dib-human. Now." Tak backed her up.

"Don't make me get up." Gaz cracked her knuckles, ready to deliver punishment at any moment.

"Yes, PLEASE don't make her get up." Tak added.

"You're both crazy! I'm getting out of here!" Dib said and he ran upstairs, screaming like a maniac. A few seconds later, the sound of glass breaking could be heard. Dib had jumped out of the window in his room and ran off. To where he had no idea, but he didn't care. He just ran (so far away).

"My brother, the drama queen." Gaz said, shaking her head.

"Yeah. Now, where were we?" Tak asked and they continued their sexual act.

The speed increased more and more, to the point where neither of them could stand it anymore and they both released.

Tak laid her head down, comforted by the soft flesh of Gaz. "That...was great." she said in between pants.

"Yeah...I've never had...sex with...an alien...before." she replied.

"Me...neither."

XxxxxxX

Eh, I tried. And also, I have no regrets (as of now). Eh...that was...okay, I guess. If you didn't like it, oh well. I guess you can all review now. No flames! Or death threats (I get plenty of those already...I'm not a stalker). And, I swear to God, this was not my idea (as far as I know). Wait, it was. Eh, you better check your data again. 'Cause I sure as hell don't remember coming up with this piece of crap. Well, I better sign off. And quickly, too. I'd hate to turn around and find my mother peering over my shoulder *slowly and carefully turns around* Mom? Just kidding. Seriously though, that'd suck. And also, to everyone, forgive if this lemon sucked. I mean, this is my lemon. Not to mention the fact that I'm fourteen, but that's no excuse (or is it?). And, yeah, the ending was terrible. Forgive me for that one, too. I've been writing this one all fucking day. And it's hard to come up with a good ending when you're tired...and suffering from Writer's Block (I get that CONSTANTLY, no idea why). And I also just noticed that both Zim and Gir weren't in this (they weren't even mentioned), it's the first (and so far the only) thing I've written where's that's happened.

By the way, here's a list of pop culture references (all but the Drawn Together one are included, no one's found that one as of yet): The whole "I'll be in my room." "Doing what?" "Whadda you think?" was taken directly from the Family Guy episode "Perfect Castaway", which was, in turn, a parody of both "Perfect Storm" and "Castaway". I know Tom Hanks was in Castaway,(Wilson! Wilson!) but was he in Perfect Storm, too? I forget. All I know is that at one point in Perfect Storm they have a radio that plays "Man in the Box" by Alice in Chains(damn, that's a good song). The fact that Tak said "Irk damn it" is a reference to the fact that Irkens commonly replace the words "God" and "Lord" with "Irk" (in most things I've read they do). Dib jumping out of the window is a Simpsons reference, characters are ALWAYS jumping out of windows on that show. Example, Dr. Nick: "Ah, such a nice day. I think I'll go out the window. (jumps out of the window)." The various nicknames from Tak is just a reference to the habit Irkens have for coming up with funny synonyms for humans. Gaz not wanting anyone to touch her sodas, well that one's obvious. Membrane's thoughts on his son are also obvious. The grass not growing back is a reference to the fact that Tak usually crashes her ships in Dib's back yard. And Tak being a true woman...a reference to me. Because I'm sick of people always making Irkens hermaphrodites. I mean, I understand the whole incubation chamber and no breeding for military purposes and all, but it's still gross. Know why? Because it reminds me of Hutts, that's why. Hutts are disgusting, slug-like, grotesque, ugly, bad-smelling (you get the deal) hermaphroditic sentient beings of life that exist in the Star Wars universe (mostly as gangsters and crime lords). Notable Hutts include Jabba Desilijic Tiure, Ziro Desilijic Tiure and Gardulla Besadii the Elder. Hutts aren't something to like...they're disgusting. So don't expect any hermaphroditic Irkens in my stories, just a heads up.


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